Dancing Naked by the Pale Moonlight....

Yesterday Sar and I had to pick Em up after school, we decided to take Lilli with us (its impossible to bring Maizy along...she is embarrassing beyond all reason...she screeches and howls at cars driving by us and at people walking down the street and bikers and other dogs and mailmen and squirrels and roadkill and the wind...) we take Lil with us every where, she is quite the little social butterfly and can get even the crabbiest person to smile, she's such a little flirter. Whenever we pull up to stop lights Lil stands up on her hind legs peeks out the window with her perky little cock-eyed ears and the person in the next car just has to laugh and talk to her. Mostly though Lilli's habit in the car is to curl up in my lap and fall asleep while I am driving..I feel like maybe I should wear a Chaufers hat and a black suit and tie. I do love taking her along with us because she is so well behaved and we hardly even know she is there...so unlike her older sister. After we picked Em up from school I noticed that Em had some seriously dry lips, they were all chapped and cracking (she has a habit of licking them constantly especially outside and the wind really does a number on them) we were really close to the local "Health Food Store" so I left Em and Sar and Lilli in the car and ran in to find some chapstick...at this health food store finding chapstick that is just plain and simple chapstick is impossible, everything has Hemp in it (derived from marijauna) if I wanted my daughters lips to smell like marijauna we'd all just smoke a little!! JUST KIDDING!!! I did finally find a few different flavors one Mint/Lavender and one Lemon/Tangerine both of which still contained Hemp but thankfully neither one of these scents made me want to run outside and wrap my arms around an oak tree so I bought the Lemon/Tangerine for Em. While I was shopping around in the little store I found some homemade and completely all natural hand lotion it was called Kitchen Lotion and apparently if you use it after you do dishes it wards off dishpan hands and evil spirits. It had all kinds of crazy herbs in it and it smelled alot like dancing naked by the pale moonlight, carrots and brussell sprouts with a little Patchouli thrown in just to take that nasty smell of freshly smoked pot right off your finger tips...naturally I had to try some from the tester bottle...that was about roughly 16 hours ago and my hands still smell like a bonafided tree-hugger's hands regardless of the fact that I have since washed dishes, my hands a million times and my face just before bed and poor Lilli smells exactly the same because as soon as I slide back into my car seat after slathering the stuff all over my hands she jumped in my lap and kissed my face while I gave her great big hugs and kisses. Now I own a small dog that smells like she should be wearing only 100% cotton clothing and clogs and only bathe once a month in a bubbling creek in the middle of a green pasture...