On the Road to Gran...
I haven't really posted very much on my blog about how Grandma is doing, it has been very frustrating dealing with the Doctors and Nurse's, every time that we talk to them they have an entirely different story to tell, there are so many different health care professionals dealing with her at any given time that it has been extremely difficult to get a straight and knowledgeable anwser from any of them. I honestly have wondered if any of them actually have any clue at all. That being said, we have recently received great news from her Doctor, after months and months of being told that Grandma is far too ill to be moved to a closer facility, one that would allow us to visit her more then once a week, they are finally saying that her health has improved enough to move her. YEAH!! I only hope that we do not receive a phone call saying that this has changed once again...it would not surprize me.
During Grandma's illness and hospital stay, my sister, my mom and I have been treated pretty rotten by our distant family members, most of which have hardly visited Grandma during all of this. We have been criticized about everything. Apparently we have not been visiting her enough, we haven't shared enough of her medical info with them, we haven't tried hard enough to get her closer to us, we haven't sought enough medical attention(Hello?!!She is in the flippin' hospital its not like we have her locked in an attic some where in a broken down abandoned house!!) I have let these people get me down and have stressed over what they think for far long enough, they are completely ignorant and I don't really think they deserve any more of my consideration or sleepless nights. Its kind of funny how the people in Grandma's life that are doing the most criticizing and complaining about us, are also the ones that have done absolutely nothing to help her through this rough patch she is going through...where are they, when did they visit or call her? And for that matter where were all of these "concerned" people before she got sick? How often did they see her then? Or call her just to see how she was. I love my grandma and have been going through Hell watching her suffer like this and it has been especially painful to have her so far away , I have children in school and 2 jobs and a truck that guzzles gas but I still managed to drive 8 hours a day once a week to see her...most of the people complaining about my sister, my mom and I, all live within 30 minutes of Grandma's hospital...so to them I would say GET OFF YOUR OWN FAT ASSES...we are doing the best we can if you think you can do better THEN DO IT !!!
Well I feel better... ;o
During Grandma's illness and hospital stay, my sister, my mom and I have been treated pretty rotten by our distant family members, most of which have hardly visited Grandma during all of this. We have been criticized about everything. Apparently we have not been visiting her enough, we haven't shared enough of her medical info with them, we haven't tried hard enough to get her closer to us, we haven't sought enough medical attention(Hello?!!She is in the flippin' hospital its not like we have her locked in an attic some where in a broken down abandoned house!!) I have let these people get me down and have stressed over what they think for far long enough, they are completely ignorant and I don't really think they deserve any more of my consideration or sleepless nights. Its kind of funny how the people in Grandma's life that are doing the most criticizing and complaining about us, are also the ones that have done absolutely nothing to help her through this rough patch she is going through...where are they, when did they visit or call her? And for that matter where were all of these "concerned" people before she got sick? How often did they see her then? Or call her just to see how she was. I love my grandma and have been going through Hell watching her suffer like this and it has been especially painful to have her so far away , I have children in school and 2 jobs and a truck that guzzles gas but I still managed to drive 8 hours a day once a week to see her...most of the people complaining about my sister, my mom and I, all live within 30 minutes of Grandma's hospital...so to them I would say GET OFF YOUR OWN FAT ASSES...we are doing the best we can if you think you can do better THEN DO IT !!!
Well I feel better... ;o
posted by Lucy Kruze at 7:23 AM
9 Comments:
Once again you have put it perfectly, the next time they call me with attitude to get info about Gram the nice gloves are comin off and I'm going to lay them strait "Lucy says to get off your fat asses and go see her for yourself you stupid jackass" the last part I know you would want me to add for you being its your favorite word and all. I think it might just work too.
Nicely written...physicians can be (are) so frequently frustrating. One can only hope that despite their challenges in talking with the families of patients, their expertise with patients is top drawer. I wish you well during this time of challenge.
I've been waiting for an update on what had you down. I was pretty sure it was your grams. I know it's frustrating. Not much you can do with the doctors unless you are there 24/7. So many cooks in the kitchen and no one's adding spices.
As for the family, I gotta ask you what do you have to lose by saying exactly that? Reality check. You aren't there. They are! Hello? Maybe you should ask them for this information and what is it exactly that they are doing? You'd like to know. The fact that you are seeing her as often as you are is doing quite a bit.
Last, but not least, (my 75 cents worth), remember that some people frequently accuse others of things that they are guilty of. A cheating husband accuses his wife of cheating. A thief accuses others of stealing. In your case, The family is negligent and so they accuse you of being the same.
My personal smartass comeback is a real slow "Yeah. Let me get back with you on that."
Take care.
Anna...you should use the word Jackass often and loudly when speaking to our distant family members and throw in a few more words like...idiot,self-absorbed and useless. Oooops shame on me did I say that?
Refugee...
I do hope that the Physicians dealing with Grandma are top~notch and I assume they are, I think the problem is that there are far too many of them dealing with her and there is just so much mis-communication between them, Grandma was actually on a very strong antibiotic for over 3 weeks it made her very lethargic and sleepy and she could barely communicate with us or recognize any of us, the docs said she was being treated for an infection...after 3 weeks on the med they finally tell us that she didn't have an infection at all and they were unsure as to why she had ever been on the antibiotic in the first place. Very scary that my short little funny and loveable grandma has to be at the mercy of one persons "hunch" or "whim". I do feel sorry for the elderly, I had know idea until Gran had to go thru this that there really is not a safe haven for them, and it is a bit disturbing to listen to the way the nurses talk to them, as though they are children or infants, they deserve more respect.
Kath...
Gran's illness and the family members are just 2 pieces in the puzzle...I think its a 1000 piece puzzle, borrowing a phrase from the "Refugee"
"its just life" it is just life, I have a great life, I love my life, its just that once in a while things pile up all at once and its a little hard to deal, Thank God it happens rarely and usually only lasts a day.
You are absolutely right about the "too many cooks in the kitchen" I agree that would be the problem in Gran's case...Thank God she will be moving soon...to a smaller more personal facility...she was there once before a few years ago and they really helped her out, I can't wait til she is closer I hate it that she only has visitors once or twice a week, she needs her family around her especially during all of this.
Amen! and boy can i relate! Especially in my line of work! I know you are all doing the best you can and you need to tell them all to go to he## and you couldn't have said it better.
Blondie
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